The Kendra's Journal Podcast (Personal Journal)

This is not an April Fool's joke. This is, in fact, our final episode of the podcast.

I'm not sure how many of you have caught my (Phill) attempt at using a song title for most of the last 100 or so episodes. I tried to use a current title that I thought Mom might have been listening to. She was deeply influenced by music so it would be no surprise if the popular songs of those days were influential.

For this last episode, I am doing something different. Mom was a huge fan of Janis Joplin. I think that's one person she felt reflected her own worldview. Piece of My Heart very accurately describes how Mom loved. She gave everyone her all, no matter what. If she loved you, she LOVED you.

This journey has been very cathartic for Mat and me. We very much appreciate all of you who have been listening. These episodes should be around for quite a while. We hope you've enjoyed our story.

The End.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_272.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

More moving then Mom stops writing for over a year. The "C" word is referenced and Mom tries to get Social Security Disability. She has another surgery and then there's another time jump and some big changes. Mat talks about his strange 35th birthday.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_271.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom's moving again then stops writing for a year or more. The "C" word is used. Mom was also looking into getting SSDI going. Then she has surgery to remove her bladder. There's another time jump and big changes. Mat talks about his strange 35th birthday.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_270.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

We have birthdays in this one! Little Mat turns 10, Phill turns 33, Big Mat turns 32, and Cameo turns 9. Money is still rough but getting a little better. Mom feels lucky to have a great boss. More patent revisions are completed and Mom starts making "Curling Iron Cozies", a small, heat-proof sleeve to put hot curling irons into. Financial stress gets her to the point of temporary insanity. Then she's evicted, loses another cat (2 left), and gets fired.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_269.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:43pm PDT

Mom started a new job but was then fired. Vegas (the person) pissed her off. Then she had a very lucky day and we finished the final draft of the patent. Mom lost another job and isn’t happy about getting and feeling older. She moves and gets another job, then another move. Mat tells us a story about OJ Simpson.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_268.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 3:22pm PDT

Mom started a new job but was then fired. Vegas (the person) pissed her off. Then she had a very lucky day and we finished the final draft of the patent. Mom lost another job and isn’t happy about getting and feeling older. She moves and gets another job, then another move. Mat tells us a story about OJ Simpson.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_268.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 3:22pm PDT

Mom started a new job but was then fired. Vegas (the person) pissed her off. Then she had a very lucky day and we finished the final draft of the patent. Mom lost another job and isn’t happy about getting and feeling older. She moves and gets another job, then another move. Mat tells us a story about OJ Simpson.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_268.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 3:22pm PDT

Mom started a new job but was then fired. Vegas (the person) pissed her off. Then she had a very lucky day and we finished the final draft of the patent. Mom lost another job and isn’t happy about getting and feeling older. She moves and gets another job, then another move. Mat tells us a story about OJ Simpson.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_268.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 3:22pm PDT

Sorry about the long intro. Mom might spend Christmas with a new guy, until... She questions her options on whether to be alone or with an idiot. It ends up being her worst Christmas. We also get an update on the patent. 2007 begins but there's still no money. Then she gets a job, and loses the job, and gets a job, and loses the job, and gets a job... Happy 31st Birthday Mat!! Getting unemployment money helps pay some bills and it's back to job hunting. Then there are drug test issues.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_267.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

We have posted several pictures from our past, even showing Mom as a baby. Scroll through our feed and take a look. Back to the Journal, Mom hears some shocking news and has a lucky day. Financial issues have her trying to find ways to pay for everything and with her hours being cut at work Mom’s focusing on job hunting. And when Mom's back goes out her “friends” are not willing to help her. Some unexpected money arrives in the mail and Mat starts faxing a bunch of resumes for Mom. She mentions a new guy and is sent a notice about her student loans.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_266.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

If you need a podcatcher, check out Pocket Casts. We're not sponsored by them but Phill's employer owns them. Let us know if you like it.

Mom has big money problems and continues to look for "real" work. Mat tells a story about his typing class in high school. A potential job at a law office falls through. Mom implies she will avoid the casinos because of her money issues. Phill turns 32 and Mom worries about her cats because of the neighbor's dog. Then Mom has troubles at work.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_265.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom's financial situation gets worse after 5 nights in Vegas but she's hoping for a bonus at work. We boys get a shock about something Mom wrote. She makes the decision to move back to Vegas and feels like she has a job lined up. Shoulder pain is limiting Mom's abilities. Another moving day, she's rented a "Casita" in Vegas. Then Mom suffers a huge loss and is left heartbroken. But, she starts a new job, so there's that.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_264.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 10:49am PDT

Mom works on revisions to the patent and gets a little support when it comes to moving back to Las Vegas. She also spends another weekend there and has her 48th birthday. She has more pain and visits the doctor but has a hard time believing they can do anything for her pain. Big money problems come up and then get worse. She tells Mat that she might be moving back to Las Vegas then tries to contact Oprah about the patent. Yes, that Oprah.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_263.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom's thoughts are on the patent again. She briefly considers completing the Paralegal program. Of course, there is more Vegas drama and her Arizona social life pretty much ends. An incident at work prompts Mom to look for something new. After another trip to Las Vegas, she's exhausted but planning another one. She's hoping to win some money to get her bills paid. Then the frustrations in Arizona have her considering a move back to Las Vegas.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_262.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Due to work, Mom is missing an event. She’s also in a slump of work, home, work, home. So she goes to Las Vegas. She continues planning to move to her employer’s corporate offices. She then meets and dumps a guy in Arizona and takes another trip to Las Vegas to visit Vegas (the ex-boyfriend) and other friends. She’s keeping him in the “friend zone”, sorta. Mom then deals with bad cats and a sad dog. She has more news on the patent and Phill goes to see a specialist in Portland.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_261.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

It looks like Mom is headed south again. It's official, she got the job in Arizona and has a small window to move and get back to work. Packing time! She loans Phill her TENS unit for his Bells Palsey. Then he goes to see a specialist. He is told there's the possibility of a tumor. Then it's time to make the move and get back to work. She likes Arizona but feels she needs to do something to gain her freedom.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_260.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Drama on the phone and Mom continues to try for a job in Arizona. Recent contact has put Vegas on her mind. While waiting to hear back from the Arizona job a new opportunity in Portland comes up. Another MRI on the shoulder is needed too.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_259.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom rented a new apartment which means another moving day. Her new neighbors are driving her crazy and she briefly thinks about Seattle. Phill gets Bell's Palsy and Mom deals with more shoulder issues. And Vegas reaches out.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_258.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom got to take grandma to her first Blazers game! And they won! Mom also puts in more applications for transfers to Arizona and the Journal turns 31 :-) Vegas (the person) comes up to Oregon and a quick trip to Cabo relieves some of the stress of life. That is countered by a visit to the dentist, which is never fun. Also a quick trip to Bend is surprisingly fun. Mom gets her mind stuck on Vegas and questions of the future but it looks like she’s on the move again!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_257.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 2:49pm PDT

Mom has something of a social life in Oregon and so does her neighbor. There’s a weird work situation that leaves her wondering and she’s moving into the new apartment that the job provides a discount on. Mom gets word from her attorney then a whirlwind trip to Las Vegas gives her time to think. She still has a bit to move but there’s progress and Hoop goes to the vet. Mom also gets grandson Mathew a birthday gift and plans a night out with her mom.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_256.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom starts with a new temp job but is looking for something permanent. She also wants to make a video to win a custom bike. A new kitten! She starts working on prototypes of the patent and planning a trip to Mexico. The, A NEW JOB! There are some money troubles but Mat's on it. Mom wonders, will she be alone forever?

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_255.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom deals with the fallout of leaving her job.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_254.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom got a job! So money is getting better but Valentine’s Day gets her down. She’s been keeping her distance from everyone south of her. She did get a special visitor that she hasn’t seen in a very long time. Shoulder trouble leads to an ER visit, twice. Mom has a new apartment on the horizon so she needs to get some new furniture. Off to K-Mart! Things were going pretty well at work and Mom was approved for a new bike! But then…

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_253.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Christmas shopping then a Christmas road trip to Hermiston. New Year puts Mom into a funk but she has high hopes for the patent in 2005, “Dreams are the Blueprints of Reality”. The doctor gets back to her with her test results. There might be a coffee date in the near future but she’s getting weird vibes about Vegas showing up in Portland.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_252.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

We’re back! Sorry about the delay, traffic was backed up a bit… Mom made contact with a company regarding the patent and has dreams of it going to market in the next year or so. She’s still struggling with the idea vs. the reality of her relationship with Vegas. The cat she left behind is on her mind too. She hopes the cat will forgive her when she gets her back. She also does more online dating, kind of. The eye doctor and food stamps kept her busy then she gets a job interview! She has a follow-up doctor’s appointment but that means more tests. Some free furniture heads her way and as Christmas approaches Mom and Rachel get evacuated for a bomb threat while shopping. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_251.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

We have posted an episode a week for a full year, 52 weeks straight! We will be taking August off though so take that time and catch up on older episodes if you haven’t yet. In the Journal, Mom has more emotional confusion as “Vegas” tries and fails at being a player. It leaves her wondering if here “White Knight” will ever show up. She finally gets the check she was waiting for but “Vegas” had opened all of her mail before sending it to her in Oregon. A doctor's visit leaves Mom with some bad news. She did some investigation and doesn’t like what she finds. The job search begins as well and Mom plots a Payback. Enjoy the show, see you in September!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_250.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 9:59am PDT

Mom’s in Portland and trying to get Vegas to send her mail and she’s struggling to understand what’s happening between them. More mind games from him have her feeling foolish. Voc rehab might help Mom get back on track and Phill turns 30.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_249.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 9:03am PDT

Well, we’re a bit late this week, but still getting one out this week. We’re at 50 episodes in a row now! Back in 2004…

There are money troubles and job hunting. We get an update on the settlement and Mom is looking into a paralegal program again. Another fight with Vegas leaves her sitting at a casino with nowhere to go. North to South, South to North, which way to go? And maybe some changes?

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_248.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 8:28pm PDT

A trip to Sacramento gets interrupted and Mom calls out Vegas because he’s still sneaking around. She gets explicit explaining the situation between her, Vegas, and another woman. We take a side trip to share a story about the “Umatilla Cowboy” we remember growing up and we go off book for a bit to talk about what Mom has going on. We cross the 30th anniversary of the Journal too! Back in 2004, Mom is in and out of the house (again). It doesn’t help that there are more money problems and doctor visits to deal with. Then Mom gets an unexpected introduction…

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_247.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 9:40am PDT

We had a technical glitch so there are no reminders at the beginning of this week. Sorry, you don’t get to hear us ramble for five minutes before we start reading ;-) Mom hears from Vegas in this one and later gets a reminder of why she left. Online dating is feeling like a bust, what she really wants is a bad boy with a heart of gold. She goes to Hermiston for her favorite grandson’s birthday but he ends up in the hospital with bronchitis. Then she returns to Las Vegas and tries to improve her life, relationship, and physical/mental health. Money is still tight without the settlement then Vegas makes her question her decision to return. More talk about marriage?

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_246.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

We start with a long and stressful week. Between a death, more stress, and pills Mom’s had enough. Another car accident? Really? Mom finally gets off the rollercoaster she’s been on and puts some plans in motion. And as we always used to sing before a road trip as a family, “On the road again, just can’t wait to get on the road again.” Thanks, Willie. Eby the cat finds a new life in California while Mom is headed to Oregon. Once there she gets some time to reflect. She also amends her Will to remove Vegas from it. There’s also news on the settlement and Mom begins the process of “rebounding”.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_245.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom questions what Vegas plans to do on his trip. She also starts planning her own road trip. She also writes out her Last Will and Testament for us and to protect anything the patent might someday bring in. Mom feels relaxed with Vegas gone and has a Girls’ Night while he’s away. There are some money issues but with a bit of hustle, it isn’t as much of a problem.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_244.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

RIP Rick James. Mom gets to go deep-sea fishing! They caught some fish, cooked them, then… She gets another shot in the shoulder to help with pain and finally gets a full night’s sleep. Vegas is playing mind games and fighting with Mom, she thinks she might be ready for a nervous breakdown. Also, Vegas hits the road for his long trip with his friends.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_243.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Vegas is not scoring any points with Mom, but marriage? She notes how the passion is gone and questions his fidelity. She voices some concern about the patent and reflects on close to 30 years of writing the Journal. And as always “money, money, money” the never-ending problem.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_242.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

House work leads to arm pain and meds. Mom was worried about being locked out of the house again and the never-ending money problems. She’s looking for BIG money from patent and dreams about what she’d do with that kind of money. Boredom sets in and she hopes of getting her settlement will allow her to have some fun. A surprisingly busy day leaves Mom questioning where her life is.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_241.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 4:47am PDT

Mom’s making moves to get a deposit on an RV and there’s a lot of anticipation for her settlement money. The patent application is published plus Mom turns 46. Oddly enough that’s the same age Phillip is now. Thunderstorms and rain come around along with Mat and Rachel who take a vacation to Las Vegas. Mom gets kicked out of her place so she ends up staying in their hotel room. Rachel introduces Mom to Hot Topic.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_240.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

WARNING: Extra Explicit Episode! Mom’s doctor asked if she did something to cause her shoulder pain. She didn’t mention what was going on with Vegas. She starts taking measures to protect herself, or at least leave a mark if she can’t. Another day and another fight leads to Mom considering her options again. Stress about money seems to be a daily thing. She’s also considering going to church. An old friend pops up and Mom wonders if there’s a hidden motive. She’s also hurt because she was left out of some fun and a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert could lead to jail time.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_239.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 8:10am PDT

With logs of post-surgery pain maybe Mom was pushing too hard. She’s processing her recent split with Vegas and suspects she’s being watched. She gets some disappointing news with regard to her settlement. Even more bad news has her spinning out of control and she contemplates life and death. With a lack of options, Mom moves back in with Vegas, but only “platonically”. It doesn’t take long for the fighting to start up again. She plans to go to a shelter but ends up staying. More fighting leads to more abuse. She considers getting a bike, truck, and trailer then just living on the road with her settlement money.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_238.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Sorry about the intro, there was some kind of technical glitch. Mom sees a year since the accident but is still in pain and still waiting on the money. She’s not with Vegas but still in contact with him so there’s fallout to deal with. She reflects a lot on her relationship. Ever been stranded on the side of the highway in Nevada after running out of gas? Mom moves back in with Vegas and back out again, but changing her phone number this time. This tension leads to involving others to get her things from the house.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_237.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Pain pills lead to fights which leads to sleeping in cars. This gets Mom thinking of a move to Phoenix. With the pain from surgery and the stress from her relationship she feels the need to make some big changes in her life. She just needs money to do it. Make up, fight, more sleeping in cars, then back again. Phill has a possible deployment to Iraq so Mom takes a quick trip to Hermiston to see him. Getting back, Mom and Vegas have one more big fight.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_236.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

She’s feeling like she’s in a war with this relationship. But her settlement money is getting closer and so are her dreams of getting a bike. Allergies and body aches have her down and she pays for having an active day. She hopes her upcoming surgery helps with that. The youngest grandkid turns five and Mom gets a job. Then some old friends come to town. The surgery happens, but did it help?

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_235.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom and Vegas reunite, but problems continue. She’s stressed about money troubles and she’s hoping the patent will solve them. In the meantime, she’s got Mat. The subject of getting onto Medicare pops up as an idea to help with the medical expenses. She feels old as she gets closer to her birthday and she’s feeling a lot of emotional abuse. But that doesn’t stop her from enjoying a fun weekend out of town on the bike.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_234.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 8:39am PDT

More money and relationship issues in this one. Mom's BF Vegas goes east for a bit while Mom packs up her stuff. Don't ever make her the butt of a joke. EVER! Vegas wants to get back together but Mom was still pissed. She was just waiting for that patent to bring in her riches.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_233.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

She got the apprenticeship!!! Then finds out she needs shoulder surgery, which ends up being derailed by a chicken. A bike trip to Arizona leads to a life-threatening incident and there’s more legal stuff to deal with. Mom also opens up about some of the reasons her life has been so challenging in Vegas. Mom and her guy (we’re calling him “Vegas”, sorry for any confusion) have it out again. We also took a break mid-way through recording this one and it shows.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_232.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Another big time jump (time travel, am I right?). Mom and her guy get arrested and there’s LOTS of relationship stress. Christmas wasn’t good due to the charges against her guy but she was looking forward to getting her settlement from that bike accident. And, of course, there’s more dreaming about the Patent. Phill was snowed into Portland over New Year and Mat and Rachel head to NYC. Moms legal stresses just don’t seem to end but she was testing with the carpenter’s union for an apprenticeship.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_231.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

There are some big time gaps in this one. The state job ends which pushes Mom to move forward on the Patent filing, which leads to talking about big dreams. She meets a new guy and Phill gets married. Then Mom pulls the trigger and makes her big move to Vegas. This leads to job interviews, work at a dive bar, a bad relationship and a motorcycle accident.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_230.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

There were some big gaps between entries on this one. Mom was able to take that postponed trip to Mexico. Mat got a job in Portland and eventually he and Rachel move North. 9/11/2001. This caused a lot of stress for Phill because he was a security officer at a chemical weapons base but was still waiting for his Honorable Discharge or orders back to Active Duty from the Marines. There was also a new man in the picture and a relationship that was going good comes to an end. Mom was applying for new jobs and also looked into doing nails for some extra money. Phill makes a big announcement. Then Mathew and he have their 4th and 27th birthdays, respectively.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_229.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

There was a new man to talk about. Mom also got some sad family news. Mom and Phill both have medical procedures, Phill uses that sick leave to take a small vacation with the kids. Another round of our favorite game of “Ha! What money?” was being played. Mat moved to Portland and tells the story of how that played out and how he eventually moved in with Mom.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_228.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom has court issues, a grandbaby’s birthday, and Phill has some news after a business trip. He then goes on a trip to the hospital. Mom was looking at potential man trouble and finds that internet dating is full of weirdos and married men. She even questions if a man would even fit into her life at that point. But bike rides with friends, little road trips, and fun events (including seeing the Air Force Thunderbirds) kept her busy.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_227.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

She was still dreaming of winning it big. Aren't we all? She made plans with a friend to visit the Oregon Country Fair over her birthday. There was a setback on her bankruptcy and money was tight but she was working on a budget. Phill was considering a job with the Border Patrol. She has a doctor visit then has to go back. The love life took a turn for the better when Mom meets a new guy. The family gets together to see Mat's latest play and Phill heads to Alaska for a business trip. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_226.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

There's a new infatuation and is planning on looking for a new man to add to her life. Mat and Rachel visit and Phill and Mom scare each other. She also passes on the 8mm family films she had. Car troubles have her walking again. At least she's close to work now.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_225.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom has an unexpected meeting with a very old friend, like “pre-kids” old. She gets to see her grand-babies and hopes big Mat can show up too. He has a bike she wanted to take home. She gets done with that trip and is worn out from the wild grand-babies. Money was still tight but she continued to get settled into her new place. She still had the boyfriend blues but got to go for a weekend bike ride and a birthday party! Enjoy

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_224.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Everyone was traveling! Mat went to Mom's. Mom went to the coast (and Moe's), then to Reno for a quick trip, and finally to the ER, boo. There's an update on the job search and her living situation might change. Phill's living situation did change, putting the final nail in the coffin his first marriage was in. Mom was planning to go see him. There were continuing budget issues too, but she kept her spirits up dreaming of a Harley. Oh, and technical difficulties with the end of this one. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_223.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Well, no more nail salon. Grandma comes to Boise for a visit. Mom and cats make the big move. The job hunt was still ongoing and Mom was worried. A nice Christmas came and went, as well as a New Year’s Eve party. She was still dreaming about getting a Harley but was also doing pretty well in the practical stuff too. She nailed a test for a state job that led to a letter to set up an interview. Mat got a part in a movie (sort of) and had his 25th birthday. Phill tells Mom his wife is moving out and she starts to worry about the babies.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_222.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Having a cold sucks. Having one while moving in the snow sucks more. But the packing must continue! A little bit of politics about the Bush v Gore election, odd how that correlates to the latest news, eh? 4-Runner go boom. At least it was going in the bankruptcy anyway. Phill has his 26th birthday so Mom took a trip for that and to see the grand-babies on Thanksgiving. Oh, and there was an error that Phill made in an earlier episode that he corrects here. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_221.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Happy Birthday Mat! 45, but only because you have no choice. We all know you’re an eternal 12 year old ;-)


There was lots of packing as plans fell into place for Mom’s move, with the cats. The impact of another “restart” is apparent but she had friends to help and job interviews to take. Plus, cell phones were the newest rage, might as well get one, right? Check out for the Hot Toddy recipe he knows. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_220.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

A lot of things were getting ready to change. Mom was packing and had someone interested in the condo. She was also trying to live in an RV because of her cats. Cat mom life strikes. She was just counting the days until her move at this point. The patent idea was starting to take root and Mom was dreaming of the money. She was even selling Phill on the idea of being a rich bum. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_219.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 8:15am PDT

Hey! That baking page is finally live on Check it out if you like cookies and WordPress. Well, Mom’s bankruptcy was filed and she was giving up the 4-Runner and the condo. She starts researching her patent idea and then gets more motivated about it. She also looks into Mary Kay. Is there a pink Caddy in her future? And whatever you celebrate, HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND NEW YEAR! Because regardless of what other holidays we celebrate, we’re ALL gonna celebrate the end of 2020!!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_218.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Another grand-baby birthday to celebrate! The bankruptcy looks to be a go, maybe Oprah can help? Mat was in Eugene and Phill’s divorce had him contemplating Portland. Mom was still planning on moving to Oregon, maybe getting all three back in the same area? A really cool vest was given to Mom too. Then the next “big” thing to start in our lives, The Patent. Let’s see how it goes. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_217.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 5:55pm PDT

Hey, let's start with a Mat telling a long story (it's worth it ;-) ). Then Phill recaps his relationship and how being a bit of a hacker related to that. Mom relates to his situation. She talks about a bike trip she took to Montana. Her and a friend also plan a trip to Canada. She also decides to move back to Oregon, she's behind on her house payment and may be in trouble. And to end it, let's hear another story from Mat about his roommates at the time (this one's worth it too).

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_216.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

We talk about adding a baking page to, it's not up yet, but it will be soon. Speaking of good desserts, check out the Dream Torte recipe on our Facebook page. In the Journal, Mom and Phill are okay again but money stress and loneliness are getting her to a breaking point. Great time for a quick trip to Mexico! Oh, and an old friend pops up. Does anyone remember the Rainbow vacuum?

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_215.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

There was a bit more fallout about the Journal. We stop and go over that a bit. Mom met a man that was filling her free time and she had an unexpected guest. Money was still tight but she had some coming in and a ski trip was planned. Mat talks about getting AOL disconnected at the time. Then, Mom took a break from the Journal for a bit and explains what happened.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_214.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:59pm PDT

In this dramatic episode, we recount how we managed to overcome and ultimately succeed after the Y2K tragedy. Mat has a birthday and a law school friend has a baby. Phill gets the Journal and Mom gets a reaction. A surprising update about "B". Nail exams? Nailed 'em. Now she's thinking about location. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_213.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:55am PDT

Sorry for the long intro, again. We go off-topic a bit too ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Mom was feeling the holiday blues being short on cash and a house payment coming due. She ends up taking on a side gig to make ends meet. Big gifts for Christmas and Mom unexpectedly finds an old letter that helps her feel some closure about things.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_212.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:03am PDT

It was time for a change! And a dentist! There was a possible romance in Seattle and mom's cousin fell in love (she still is!). A birthday and Thanksgiving were on the calendar too.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_211.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

A bit of current events then back to 1999! A birthday boy has his day and a trip to the hospital. Phillip gets ready to move into a new place and Mom takes a trip to see it. A scare at work and a week off of school to look for other work. Plus, a big decision is made.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_210.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Getting cozy in the condo and more family buying property. Contemplation on life and an evaluation at work. Did she cross a line? Biker Boy is back and she calls another boy. Top all that off with sick days and potential financial irresponsibility!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_209.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Condo! Cabo! Wedding bells? Just kidding! There is a wedding in this one though...

Biker boy is out again and another flame is in again. Concern over her schoolwork is causing stress. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_208.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 9:15am PDT

Closing on her condo is coming up!!! The new school was going well. She was hoping for a trip to Cabo in her near future. She couldn't seem to stay away from the dentist either. Another birthday too. Mat made his big move:

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_207.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom was really getting into her role as a grandmother (Meemaw). She started school again and was really close to buying a condo. Mat was getting ready to move to LA, there's a hell of a story. He also talked about buying his first house in PDX. Oh, and dating. She really had a thing for guys with Harley's.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_206.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom had some GI issues, we go into some detail on that. Boredom with her job had her looking for new departments to work in. Boredom with her life had her going out and continuing to date. There were two major things she was looking forward to, Cameo's birth and Sammy Hagar's concert. Priorities people! She had 'em! ;-) Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_205.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom was certainly an early adopter of online dating. She was apparently trying to become an expert at sitting in the dentist's chair too. Phillip flashes back to a story he probably told in an earlier episode. Did Cameo show up yet? Some of you already know, don't you? Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_204.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Dating sucks, especially when there's a bit more drama than you like. More time in the dentist's chair sucks too. At least she could see again. Mom waits for a new family member to arrive. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_203.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Check out this for links to the 5 latest episodes:

Mom dealt with some pain from dental work, got her bicycle going, and gave a guy another chance. She had a bit of activity on the dating front then tried to burn down her cousin's house. Phillip talks about the similarities between Mom’s life then and his life now. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_202.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 5:00am PDT

Getting ghosted, dental work, and Mat stalking actors at the Oscars. There was an internal debate on where to settle down, Boise or Oregon? And an extra day off is always a good thing. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_201.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 8:00am PDT

Mat was LA-bound after picking up the 4-Runner. Mom made a decision about the direction her life was going. Dating was... dating someone left her hanging. She was also hoping for a hot summer and tinted porch windows. We finally made it to 200! Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_200.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Exes, the early days of online dating, and slightly questionable choices in the name of background checks. Big Mat was getting ready for a trip to California to look at schools. Maybe Mom's dream of winning Publisher's Clearinghouse or the Powerball will happen and we're living off the dividends now ;-). It's been fun getting back into this process. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_199.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 1:45am PDT

We're back into the Journal on this one! We hope you enjoyed our bonus episode before this to catch up on everything. We're releasing this episode as well to share more of the Journal. In this one Mom spends quite a bit of time managing her love life. This was in the early days of internet dating so it's an interesting look into that part of the time as well as how Mom managed things. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_198.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 2:29pm PDT

So we're finally back and have begun recording again! This is a "no-content" episode to catch everyone up on where we've been and what's been occurring lately. We're also releasing Episode 198 along with this one to start getting more of the Journal done too. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_Return_Episode.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 2:07pm PDT

On a Monday morning, Mom dreamed of winning the lottery and quitting work. She also mentioned having been at her job for six months and was looking forward to getting her permanent status. She was also considering applying for law school in Idaho. She heard a Harley on a warm day and thought it might be an old boyfriend. She says she’s not ready for any relationships, just online dating. She thought she had two dates lined up. In smaller things, she want to the eye doctor to get new contacts and her cat was raising hell.  Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_197.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 7:31pm PDT

Mom was back to work after her trip to Oregon and was already missing baby Mathew terribly. She called B’s daughter to make sure her birthday gift arrived. There were some crazy things happening in school, someone from her class dropped it because the teacher was being a jerk. She was concerned the teacher would start with her next. She was also planning to retake the LSAT to try and get back into law school in Idaho. After eight days on meds, Mom didn’t feel any different about smoking. She thought her cat was crazy. She made an appointment at the veterinarian so he was about to be very unhappy. Tax return money was on the way (yay) and Grandpa got himself a new (used) motorhome. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_196.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom’s bills were paid!!! WOO HOO!!!! She had a good night at school and was trying to adjust her attitude toward the paralegal program she was attending. She also got the prescription to help her quit smoking and was planning on getting contacts. Mom planned a trip to see her grandbaby (little Mathew). A potential staff shakeup was giving her hope of landing in a better place. She was struggling a bit with the idea of staying in Boise and continuing in the paralegal program with the possibility of buying a condo. Or moving Portland where she felt she would have been closer to friends that she can spend time with outside the Friday night bar routine. She mentioned bit Mat’s “career adventure” and was also all ready for her weekend trip with her truck (Toyota 4Runner) ready and nails done. She gave Phillip and family $300 and they went shopping. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_195.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 6:24pm PDT

Mom got her student loan money and paid off a bunch of bills. She had plans for savings and wanted to buy us boys computers. She was feeling lonely too. Wishing she would meet a man that she could be happy with. She decided to just start doing things she likes and that maybe she’d meet someone with similar interests. She figured that was better than finding a guy in a bar. Then she did a “stupid thing” and drunk dialed “B”. Mom started a new hobby and had a doctors appointment with a plan to start taking a prescription medication to help her quit smoking.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_194.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

This episode is us talking about why we were away for long. We don’t read anything from the journal, so if you’re not interested in us getting caught up fell free to skip this episode.

Wait!…..How do we do this again???

We had some minor technical difficulties. This episode was intended to be released last week but we thought we lost the recording. Since we were able to find the file, we figured we’d release it this week. With that being said, we did lose episode 194 and had to re-record it, so next week when 194 is released it might seem a little out of place. Point being, hang in there! We’re trying to remember how we do this whole podcast thing!

Thank you all for waiting for us! Enjoy the new episodes!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_Bonus_Episode.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 8:29am PDT

Recorded 9-3-18

Big Mat had his 23rd birthday! Mom was living in Boise, ID and working at the courthouse while taking night classes for the Paralegal program. Classes were going well, Mom got an A on an exam. She was hoping that doing well in school would lead to a job that pays her enough to pay off the law school loans. She was in a “sort of” relationship but she and the guy had different ideas of what that relationship was. It ends up coming to a “sort of” end and she gained some insight into her feelings of a past relationship. She also decided she wanted to move to Portland after finishing the Paralegal program.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_193.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom got on AOL and started checking out the photo personals. An interesting coincidence led to a date, but was Mom ready for something serious? The holidays arrived and Mom was getting ready to go to Hermiston. Phillip shared that the baby on the way was a girl! But Happy New Year (1999) wasn’t so happy at work.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_192.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 8:06am PDT

Some time had passed and Mom was settling into post-Law School life in Boise. She was working for a lumber company but got some news that would change that. She also got her “new” used Toyota 4-Runner. She was attending school at Boise State in the paralegal program but was plagued with more back issues related to an old injury. Money was also tight and a miscalculation caused some unexpected issues. Mom signed up for AOL! By the end of the year, she was ready for 1998 to end and to move on!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_191.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 10:47am PDT

Mom was calculating what she thought her GPA would be based on the grades she was thinking/hoping she’d get. Her finals were finished but she was worried she didn’t do well enough to transfer back to Oregon. Since exams were done, Mom got herself ready to move to Boise for the summer! After she made it there she reported to work at Legal Aid, but there was a problem. Also, her grades came in… Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_190.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:57am PDT

Sorry for the long intro… We recorded on the seventh anniversary of Mom’s passing so we spent some time talking about the day. In the Journal, Mom finished her Con Law test and then went drinking. She thought it went well while she was in it but began to wonder after she finished. Mom was also anxious to get all of this over with so she could get home see little Mathew! Since the Legal Aid job in Boise said they couldn’t pay until her grades came through, Mom started to look for paying work in Boise to get her by until then. “AFTPERT” - Always Flush Toilet. Please, Everyone, Remember This. Mom put in her transfer to try and move back to Oregon. She spent a lot of time STUDYING. Lots and lots of STUDYING. One more exam for Contracts and she was nervous. But even before finishing her final exam, she was wanting to know all her grades. It was going to be weeks away so she decided to get ready for her sister to arrive and help her move back west for the summer. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_189.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 8:14am PDT

EXAMS! With her exam weeks started, Mom spent most of her time studying but did take an occasional break to hang out and get a drink with friends. She became more concerned with her GPA when she got some news about how it might impact her summer job. Mom was also becoming more competitive with Law School and how it effected her grades. The practice exams gave Mom some sense of preparedness. She had also been thinking about “B” a little, with a little less emotion this time around. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_188.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 9:18am PDT

Mom had more horoscope wisdom to share and a lot more studying! She also began looking at classes for her next year but had to be strategic with her budget. IRAC it! Mom spoke with a friend from Bend and got an update on “B”. She was really impatient for summer break but still had to get through the exams week. Also, someone was interested in her but Mom wasn’t having any of it.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_187.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 1:40pm PDT

More studying! Mom was prepping for her exams… STRESS!  She wrote about being the mystery student and her horoscopes gave her a lot to think about. She also bought some magic skin cream and partied one last time before exams then woke up wishing she hadn’t. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_186.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 10:21am PDT

School, school, school! Everything in Mom’s life at the time was school. But she did see a light at the end of the tunnel and was looking forward to being back on the west coast for the summer. She was also still hoping to transfer to an Oregon Law school for the next school year. Mat got a part in a play at the community college and Mom had plans to see it while she was home. Mom was worried about an exam she took. She was confident that she knew the material, but once she was in a test situation, she would forget how to express what she knew. She was able to get a job lined up in Boise with Legal Aid for the summer. Mom also had a UTI and worried it was going to ruin an event she planned to attend. She was able to party a bit and got a good night of sleep out of it. She also babysat one of her professor’s dog. Mom was feeling the pressure to do well on her exams and worried how she’ll pay her student loans if she wasn’t making an attorney salary. Then, Mom literally bled to get her hands on a class outline.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_185.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 7:02am PDT

Mom gave notice on her apartment in preparation for moving to Boise, ID for the summer. She also got some money and tried to eliminate some debt. “B” was still on her mind, she didn’t want him back but she did want him to see her life and how well she would do after finishing law school. Homework, homework, homework and, yes, MORE HOMEWORK! She had A LOT of homework. She was getting to crunch time with everything. Exams were very quickly approaching so she was studying but also packing and moving what she could to storage while making plans to move for the summer. She had some trouble with her study group that left her wondering what to do. Phillip started his new government job too. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_184.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 8:46am PDT

Sorry for the long intro, we got sidetracked before we could get started! Mom started prioritizing her working load for school and was working on getting more (much needed) financial aid. She was obsessing over little Mathew (because who wasn’t at the time) and was working hard on her self-confidence. There’s a lot more than this too. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_183.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Mom got back to CT after spending the holidays with family… specifically baby Mathew! On the flight home, Mom caused a panic and the airline lost her bags. Classes were starting and Mom hadn’t gotten her grades from the last semester. So heading into the next semester she was focusing on improving her writing and test-taking skills. She was starting to worry about what would happen if her grades weren’t good enough. After being in Bend, Mom reflected on her and “B”. Also, Mom has an “Ah Ha!” moment. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_182.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 5:29am PDT

Mom heard that a guy she had been interested was probably not into her, but when they spoke things got confusing. She was talking a lot about being alone and wanting to meet someone who could handle her being in law school. Mom also wondered about what would happen if she ran across “B” when she went home for vacation. Then, she spent a lot of time prepping for exams and aside from the occasional panic attack she was feeling pretty good. There was a severe lack of sleep and illness making those exams rough so she ended up going to the ER. Finally, Mom got some pictures of little Mathew and Phill told her he was going to try and go to medical school.

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_181.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 9:38am PDT

An incident at a celebration left Mom feeling embarrassed and concerned. Finals were getting close and while studying, she got an unexpected call. Phillip and family returned to Oregon after his enlistment in the Marines while Mom gushed over pictures and videos of little Mathew. She was counting down the days until she could see and hold him. She started taking steps to be more responsible with her money. There were also a lot of calls/hangups and Mom suspected it was a guy she met that wouldn’t leave her alone but she was interested in another guy… a younger guy. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_180.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT

Between this episode and the last, Mom finished her break and trip home that included a trip to Cabo, moving her thing’s out of “B’s” house and road-tripping to Arizona for Phillip’s wedding. Oh, and she got readmitted to the first year of Law School! Since she was back in school she was giving it her all. She wasn’t missing any classes and focused on learning everything she could, to include fighting her fear of exams. The National Law Journal published an article on one of Mom’s law professors, another student and her about a case Mom was helping on. LITTLE MATHEW WAS BORN! Probably the happiest day Mom had in over 20 years. Then she went shopping, something she said she should be doing. We also talk about Phillip’s teddy bear, the same one we spoke about in the early days of the podcast. Also, a surprise anniversary. Can you guess what it is? Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_179.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT


Mom continued to deal with the fallout of her relationship ending. She was trying to finish her term in school while figuring out the logistics of coming home and moving her stuff out of the house she’d shared with “B” for the last seven years. Then she got high tech! She got a law research program installed on her computer at home. She also got a bit reckless with her social life and started to let her attendance slip, a lot! When it was time to go home, Mom took a limo! Did she win the lottery?!? When summer break arrived, mom got a wake up call from school. Finally, Phillip phoned Mom telling her he was re-enlisting in the Marine Corps for another four years. Enjoy!

Direct download: Kendras_Journal_Podcast_178.mp3
Category:Personal Journal -- posted at: 12:00am PDT